Karl Lagerfeld On Choupette, Cara, and “Electronic Masturbation”-------
Ever wonder why you’ve never seen a selfie from Karl Lagerfeld? “They are this horrible thing where you are distorted. The chin is too big, the head is too small,” he told the Guardian. “No, this is electronic masturbation.” (Funnily enough, Lagerfeld installed photo booths in the fitting rooms of his new London store specifically to encourage selfies, but we’ll let it slide.) He’s not opposed to phone snaps of his beloved feline Choupette, though, and reportedly has the cat’s maid (yes, Choupette has a maid, obviously) send him photo updates of her kitty antics every hour. “Everything is controlled by her,” he asserted. “She wakes me up at 7am because she wants me to bring her fresh croquettes, she won’t touch food from the night before, she gets offers for food commercials but it is out of the question. She is a kept woman.” And while Cara Delevingne no doubt has a special place in Lagerfeld’s heart, it doesn’t sound like Choupette, who Lagerfeld once called “the most beautiful cat in the world,” has any cause for jealousy. “She is not a standout beauty,” Lagerfeld said of the model, apparently pointing out her brow line. “Was it Bacon who said, ‘There is not beauty without some strangeness in the proportions’?” On second thought, maybe Karl’s symmetrical chat should be concerned after all—perhaps she should try some false eyebrows to stay in the designer’s good graces.