Bill Clinton says he won’t attend Barack Obama’s acceptance speech on Thursday evening. Apparently, it coincides with all-you-can-eat-wings night at the Denver Hooters.

Michael Bolton and “Desperate Housewives” star Nicolette Sheridan have called off their engagement. Let’s hope this doesn’t result in Bolton growing a “breakup mullet.” Remember, Michael, no matter how beautiful and silky it is, hair can’t love you back. Stay shorn and stay strong!