"I wish you would have told me. I f---ing hate surprises." That was the response of Sean Avery of the New York Rangers to his unexpected (to him, anyway) 28th birthday party at Smith & Mills in Tribeca last night. You couldn't blame him for being just a wee bit hostile. Despite winning the playoff game earlier that day, the Calvin Klein-clad jock showed up sporting a black eye and a bloody gash on his eyebrow (which he had to delicately blot while receiving well wishers). "And those are just the injuries I know about," he said, claiming that when the adrenaline and painkillers wear off, he might find he has more battle scars. The best medication came in the form of good friends (Catherine Keener, Amy Sacco, fellow Ranger Brendan Shanahan, and publicist Lauryn Flynn, who organized the party) and assorted other easy-on-the-eye guests (May Andersen, Barbara Bush, Tara Subkoff, and Byrdie Bell). There was some good-natured ribbing going on, too: The birthday cake was a picture of a naked Sean Avery with nude Barbie dolls wrestling near his nether regions. As the night wore on, however, the tough-guy image started to waver. "OK, fine, I'm glad they did this," he sighed. "And yes, this was the best way to celebrate my birthday. But don't f---ing bother me tomorrow. We got a game Friday night."